requeim to my son renjith , the 'naughty writer'.

i am naughty writer's mother. he has teased all of us and left this world on july 3rd 2009. i never even in my imagination have thought that u will leave this world at the prime of ur youth. U had everything, yet you were not satisfied. as u told a fire was burning in u and this fire took u to an unknown world. now i want to continue his blog along. my son, i am taking certain lines from ur poem 'the mother', and reproduce it with some modification.

When he vanished, we felt hungry
When he vanished, we felt thirsty
When he vanished, we felt insecure
When he vanished, we felt homeless
When he vanished, we felt bankrupt
When he vanished, we felt naked
When he vanished, we felt wounded
When he vanished, we felt being raped
When he vanished, we felt tarnished
When he vanished, we felt death
When he vanished, we died

my son we all felt death and died mentally. As Nikos Kazantzakis in his 'report to Greco', has written abot his death - u have collected ur tools: the sight,smell, touch, taste, hearing, intellect. night has fallen, the day's work done. u have returned like a mole to ur home, the ground. not because u are tired and couldnot work. BUT THE SUN HAS SET.........

Life.........

It was raining hevily, i reached there after sun set down. There was no power, a complete black out...I got down the car and walked the muddy turn to the devasted estate; compleate wet and with dripping head...
The rubber trees where crying.
Glitters from the heven flashed as lightening lead my way to the little square which was my aim..
The newly plauged soil forms a muddy lake still keeping it's little shape of square..
I stood there and leaned to touch the soil.. it was mud a greasy one.
The man mended me layed under that mud.....
Many flashes of my childwood memmories came and gone....
I turned and walked away to my car to my rotting routines..
A wind mildly wistled in my ear and asked " After all.....What is Life my Friend..."?
I started searching the ANSWER................................

The Chemistry of Life

Life have a chemistry...One will realize that in some unexpected moments...
The rythm of life the Raga of the great cycle.....
some will get tuned to it early nd some later...
any way to realize it nd accept it is a must to reach the other end of the turbulous wave...THE LIFE....
I found it many time..unexpected..but left it behind unrecognized....
I heard the humming tune in the breeze.... but...
i saw it in the sea shore...in the sun set.... but....
i saw it in the laughs of my dear ones...but...
even it appeard againg in the tear drops of my favourite eyes.... but...
i was not tuned to accept it and recognize it.....my fault...A GREAT MISTAKE...
i got wounded many times...bled away my consiousness...but still..
i got praised for my little deeds...nd some times stoned and bleed hevily..but...
My worm rolls in the skull was not enough mature to realise the simple tune of life.. the great chemistry... of the UNIVERSE....The raga behind every blooming....
i end up nowhere..with everything... but nothing...
the clouds coverd my horizons and mask my light ...my SUN...But....Still...
After a long hectic journy with many wounds and an empty bag..Now i am realizing what i left behind unattended...
i am goin to catch it and held it to my chest...as my heart beat..so near to it...
in this terrestrial climate... i am sure .... i will be comfortable...AT LAST....

winter once again

Once aging got delhi is sheding it leaves. she is welcoming the winter. Delhi is famous for her notorious terrestrial climate.It is difficult to adjust with her hots and colds. still everyone is eagerly waiting to see her in fur coat.
I am still in my summer outfits and sweating to find a place to rest for the time being. winter season gives every beating hearts a place to rest. even the siberian cranes find abode in far away distances. I am strugling to get a place in this universe.
Delhi is busy but sh consers everyone. She will not desert any being and left to die in cod winds. I am hopefull to welcome my horizons which will lead me t my resting place.
sorry, boaring it is time to get a Rajaii and some woolen cloths. Delhi winds are whisling to alert me of the nearing cold happy months!!!

The Mother

She woke up early, and makes her routines for two works.
One for the family and the other also for the family; an earning job
She left home for office; worked hard and came late in the evening
Inhabitants of the house called WE were resting all the daylong fearing the hot sun and dusty wind outside.
She makes the food and cleans the house, washes our cloths and closed her eyes for and early morning wake.
She seasoned with the humiliations and hardwork and became THE SHE.

We made her eyes wet
We made her anxious
We made her viable
We made her head down
We made her desert her wishes
We made her desert her comforts
We made her nights sleepless
We made her hopeless
We made her pessimistic
We made her bankrupt
We made her a patient
We banned her medicines
We tore her dresses
We pour tar on her face
We injured her and salted her wounds
We made her homeless
We raped her in public
We killed her

When she vanished, we felt hungry
When she vanished, we felt thirsty
When she vanished, we felt insecure
When she vanished, we felt homeless
When she vanished, we felt bankrupt
When she vanished, we felt naked
When she vanished, we felt wounded
When she vanished, we felt being raped
When she vanished, we felt tarnished
When she vanished, we felt death
When she vanished, we died

The nightmare gone and we woke up
She was our bedside like an angel
She was caring us while we slept
She smiled and put her hands on our head
We cried aloud and hugged her
We called her MOTHER
All the universe joined our chorus.

Warm breeze will cure our thirst

• We the human are very thirsty. They will go to the extreme level to find new things. We love adventures. We are much exploratory. So We began exploring the ecology of biosphere. First slow, then came a pace which have no care to the Bio webs and rhythms. So at last what happened? Everything intertwined, oxygen with monoxide and methane with halogen…. Everything began to beat him in return of his thirst. The warm breeze from the polar region is pushing him to the AC room. It is a bigning. Beware Fire winds are coming from the Eather shorty…

Back to womb through the tomb

Glaciers Retrieve, Forest Shrink, Mountain Barren, and the Ocean rises we are descending a steep deep. Millions before when Earth was a hot piece with volcanic eruptions and hot gases with a dusty sky overlapping, climbing of life’s trajectory to a height starts. Amoeba, to little creatures to gigantic phantoms dominated her, then the big false of creation came; the Man. He eliminated almost every thing stand in front of him and makes earth his own exclusive dwelling place. He was achieving the heights of life every moment. He swam the deepest oceans, go under and flied the heights of the blue above him. He penetrated through the atmospheric shell and wandered the timeless space. Explored planets, stars and galaxies. He attained the maximum height of life’s everest. Now it is the time to descend the frightening steep; to the nothing ness, to the bigning….
While descending we will came over the past; Wars, the stone age, gigantic flies and killing volcanic gases will came across him. Then he will retrieves to the womb; the womb of time to nothingness. He will vanish and wait in that timeless womb waiting the mother earth to cool and the life to sparkle again…….